hey dad

hey dad,

how are you up there? are you okay? are you happy?

haha silly me. i don't need to ask you because I know, I believe that you're fine. and you're happy. you're so happy up there you don't want to come back :")

hey dad,

i didn't come alone today. i was with the guy I've told you about.

you heard a lot about him, but you haven't met him. so... there he was.

you guys don't know each other but dad, he saw you like he have known you for so long.

he loves you too, dad. I know it.

hey dad,

can you see? i smiled. i want you to know that i'm okay.

you know my life will never be the same without you, you know it.

but, i'm okay. i have a very strong mom and she's the one helping me to get through.

i'm surrounded by amazing friends who will never let me down.

hey dad,

can you see? he smiled with me.

he's glad to give you a visit.

he's happy to see you, too.

hey dad,

if only you could spend more time in this world, you would be happy to see him.

i mean, really. he's the kind of guy who would endlessly talk about politics with you.

he's nice, he's polite, he's smart, and he's the guy you could watch football with.

he's the guy you would befriend with.

hey dad,

he's been the one, he's the one, and he will always be the one.

he may not love me as much as you did but he does make me feel special. like you used to.

he helps me to get back up when I fall. he makes me laugh when I don't want to smile.

he's my superhuman.

hey dad,

do you know how much I miss you?

do you know how much I love you?

do you know how hard I wish to have you back?

do you know how difficult our lives have been without you?

hey dad,

I said I loved you but you didn't say I love you too.

I said I missed you but you weren't there to hug me.

I was crying but you weren't there to wipe my tears.

hey dad,

it's been awhile and I miss you so much. every single day.

but you will never be back. never. you've gone. and you've gone forever.

I may not be able to see you again but dad, I love you so much. the love will never change.

I may love him but you're my first love, and you will always be.

hey dad,

I know I'm not the best daughter you've had, but I was your favorite.

I know I'm not perfect, but you loved me.

hey dad,

I just want you to know that whenever I look up, I picture you. 

I picture you inbetween bright stars and your smile shines the brightest.

I also want you to know that whenever I remember you, I encourage myself to be better.

so when you look down at me, you'll say "that is my girl I'm proud of"

hey dad,

you know it's not a good-bye, right? it's a see you later.

you know I love you. always have, always will.

xo